15 November 2009
Just When You Thought It Was Safe…
I have been spending even more time than usual trolling my very favorite eighteenth-century full-text database for various items and topics, and, as part of my ongoing mission to demonstrate why I study the Best Century, I’ll probably be sharing a few select items. Which may sound dire, but this excellent compilation of later-century hairstyles did get a surprising amount of traction on the interwebs.
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You’ve probably picked up on how interesting I find my city of temporary residence, in all of its stylish, crumbling glory. Nevertheless, there’s been a lot of not-so-hot Montreal stuff in the news recently. The recent mayoral election was a series of almost comical exposés of inside contracts, union disputes and not-so-hidden Mafia ties; there was a horrendous Good Samaritan beating last week; the city’s generally been suffering under a lack of leadership and care; and, oh yeah, Maclean’s thinks we suck. But hey, we are still the second-best party city in the world.
That said, one of my biggest pet peeves is when people use broad strokes to paint the picture of a morally and materially corrupt present, when compared to the wholesome and naïve simplicity of the past. There’s nothing quite like reducing recent human history into a narrative of cozy, nostalgic past versus anarchic, profligate present to make my hackles rise. I mean, I know somebody — a smart somebody — who honestly thought that children born out of wedlock were entirely a 20th-century phenomenon. Seriously?
Given the pernicious nature of lingering fears over the evils of big city life, though, I recently found myself lost in The Countryman’s Guide to London: or, Villainy Detected. Being a clear Discovery of all the various Tricks and Frauds that are daily practiced in that great City, printed in 1775. Happily, only one shilling will buy you one of the many copies available of The New Cheats of London Exposed; or, the Frauds and Tricks of the Town laid open to both Sexes. Being a Warning-Piece against the iniquitous Practes of that Metropolis. Your shilling reveals the secrets of all “the various Cheats, Frauds, Villainies, Artifices, Tricks, Seductions, Strategems, Impositions and Decemptions” that “innocent Country People” must be “completely on their Guard” against, including:
- Bawds!
- Bullies!
- Duffers!
- Fortune Tellers!
- Footpads!
- Gamblers!
- Gossips!
- Hangers-on!
- Highwaymen!
- House-breakers!
- Jilts!
- Initelligencers!
- Jew Defaulters!
- Insolvents!
- Kidnappers!
- Lottery-office-keepers!
- Mock Auctioneers!
- Money Droppers!
- Ring Droppers!
- Pimps!
- Pretended Friends!
- Procurers!
- Procuresses!
- Pickpockets!
- Quacks!
- Receivers of stolen Goods!
- Spungers [sic]!
- Sharpers!
- Swindlers!
- Smugglers!
- Shop-lifters!
- Street-robbers!
- Trappers!
- Way-layers!
- Waggon-hunters
- Whores, &c. &c. &c.!
Oh, to know more about the &c. &c. &c.! Remember, children:
Beware fond Youth, O! shun their artful wiles,
Nor seek for Pleasure in a Harlot’s smiles;
She smiles to wound–she flatters to destroy,
For Death’s the end of each unlawful joy.
“She smiles to wound” — is this catchy little ditty original to this text?
I would guess so — the C18 does have a thoroughgoing love of antitheses, so there is a great deal of smiling to wound, pleasure giving pain, stooping to conquer, etc etc.
My favorite thing is the “each.” It either serves to scare you away from visiting a harlot even once, or infers that if you go a-whoring once, you go a-whoring frequently. (Boswell, I am looking sternly in your direction.)
I read That Fatal Shore many years ago and was dumbfounded to read that people were shipped to Australia for stealing bread. Stealing a live sheep was a hanging offense. Things were different.
If I remember, it used to be the ‘early modern’ (15th-16th c.) period that was ‘so hot’ in lit/cultural studies, what with its naive conceptions of the body, etc.
So are there “The 18th century is the new 16th century” & “The 1500s are so 2002″ t-shirts? Maybe just “I’m all about the 18th century”.